Flesh and Blood

**imported_JLR** · February 18th, 2006, 12:58 AM

You know I have been sitting here thinking lately about some things. I haven't posted on this, but I'm sure everybody on here knows what I am talking about. What I mean you ask? This is the typical every day battle. Parents Versus Teenagers. Every day A Parent is battling their teenage son or daughter, and challenging them to be right. I'm in the mood to hear other opinions on this matter, yet I have my own. I never thought my mother and I would be battling so much, but its obvious we disagree on alot of matters. I am called rebelious, I am called a beast, just because I have my own opinions. I am told I am hard headed, and that I need to be controlled? why? because I want to live my own life.

I know my parents mean well, and I know they love me. They put clothes on my back, and get me whatever I want. They are easily the best friends I have had. Yet sometimes home feels like the most unstable place in the world. I am told who I can talk to, and when I can do it. I am told I can't do things for the silliest reasons imagineable. I have worked hard to earn trust, I have never did a drug.. nor have I been in any trouble at school. That should account for something? No.. I am sterotyped as " You are the same as any other teenager, not trustworthy, and full of hormones."

I understand my parents were kids once too, oh man, we have all heard that saying. We have also heard the saying "you can't get anything past us." Any of this sound fimilar? to me it most certainly does. Used too it wasn't that big of a deal, hang around with my friends.. everything seemed happy. Then, boom.

Here I am, having a girlfriend.. and now my parents want to control this as well. recently threatening me with punishment for not breaking up with her. Then trying to get me to stop talking to my best friend, since third grade. Why? because both of them have their own opinions.. and what do parents NOT like? Conflicting opinions. Well, not all.. but in my parents eyes.. friends and dates.. all "bad influences."

So what is your all's opinions on this matter, because it is eating at me. I have had two older brothers, who have became complete screw ups and failures. They chose to make the wrong choice, and now I am carrying the load for their mistakes. I'm a different person, with a different mind.. yet I'm sterotyped. No offense to all you parents out there who are just trying to protect their flesh and blood. But I think I deserve an equal oppurtunity.. and show I am the one who can get this right. But I'm judged, and "influenced" by my older siblings who screwed up, and I whole heartedly believe.. it is not right.

But what do you guys think? who has parents like these.. and I'd appreciate it if someone told me how to ride it out. This road is just about to get rockier.. and no one seems to care but me.

**imported_Sportsman** · February 18th, 2006, 01:28 AM

I know it's a battle for you, life is full of battles. Living and growing through the teenage years is one of the toughest periods of your life.

I will give you this advice. Be thankful that you have parents who truly care. You'd be surprised at the young people who's parents care more about themselves than they do their children. If the truth be known, some of your best friends or some of the people you think have the best lives or the coolest parents, may tell you that they wish their parents cared enough about them to discipline them, or to want to be involved in their lives.

It's amazing how much smarter your parents will be when you are 25 years old as compared to when you are 16.

**Unchained** · February 18th, 2006, 10:59 AM

Good post/advice Sportsman
I know JLR well, and he's not your "typical" teenager. He's a great kid (if my sons turned out like him, I'd be cool with that-can pay him no greater compliment). It's hard at his age with parents. We've all been there, but like you said 25 yrs down the road, he'll appreciate much more deeply than now how much they were looking out for him. Hey, it's a terrifying time to be a parent in this day and age. I would advise him to ride the storm, love his folks. Soon he will be out and on his own anyway. Don't burn any bridges. I am almost 33 and call my Mom for advice often. I would my Dad as well if he were alive.

**imported_Dynomite** · February 18th, 2006, 12:42 PM

I'm glad to see some advice to JLR from some of the elders, and I thank you for that.

I just have one question for parents. Josh's parents have known him well.... almost his whole life [/sarcasm]. and well, they should understand that he will not grow up to be the abomination that his brothers have grown up to be, they are holding what his brothers have done against him. They, well, she is acting like Josh is a illness ready to become terminal, and this, ladies and gentlemen, is NOT the case.

Guys like me and JLR have a great gift, and that gift is an eye for things that go on around us. We have noticed the constant stereotypes going on around us, not only do we want to avoid teenage problems, but we want our own uniqueness in that we turn out in the best way possible/if not better. It's the parents of this generation that have to understand they have brought forth a better teenage force (well, for the....some of them >&lt

.

**imported_JLR** · February 18th, 2006, 09:27 PM

I agree respect is something that needs to be shown. Not only by me, but by any child to their parent. I can understand alot more now with some of the things being said, Mostly, it is the times we live in it seems. I love my mom, and I love my dad. He isn't my dad by blood, but he's been here for me when nobody else would be. My biological father left me before I was born, he didn't want me. But instead of letting that bother me, I've based my life on making him regret the fact he made this decision. I think he does everyday, if he doesn't then that is his loss. They've been there for me, they've got me everything I have wanted, as I said before. Most of all however, they are the very reason I'm the kid some of you know so well today.

My mom had a rough childhood, so there is alot of things I can understand. I know she is wise, and knows alot about the life I am living. But, instead of looking at the good things.. her past experiences has obviously made her blind. It's not her fault, and she's good for being cautious, yet she's blind to the good. The good is living in her home, and that is me. Not only me, but my younger sibling. We look nothing alike and we do not have the same father. But no matter, he is my brother.. and I have been a role model for him throughout my years. I listen to my parents, I do what they ask, and I lend my helping hand.

Everyone who has read this should take some notice on something before I end this post. You only have one mother, you only have one father.. or father figure in my case. The point is, they created you.. they rasied you from a baby. They have done everything for you, and you may take that for granted. But boys and girls, they aren't going to be here forever.. If I outlive my parents, I dread the day of their passing. I will never be the same when they are gone. But it's a hard call for them, to listen to my opinions. Even if they say things that hurt me alot when we have these talks, I should still listen.. and all of you should to. Respect them, it will get you somewhere.

The only problem I have with them is the fear they have, even if it is a valid feeling. They expect me to screw up, even they have said it. My mom has had talks with my dad, and even he says she notes that she expects me to turn out just like my brothers. I can understand her claim, yet.. that insults the very reason I have worked so hard to become myself. To be better, to make something of myself, and most of all.. like Indian_Dad said.. not to be your "typical" teenager. I have given respect, and I ask for it back.. I'm a young man now, I think it's time I start making some decisions on my own. That doenst mean GET OUT on my own, because lord knows I couldn't make it. But my life is just now starting, I know they want it to keep moving. But they are halting it more than they think, I love them.. and I respect them. But in a little more than a year I'm considered a man.. it's time I start acting like one.

**Biggin** · February 18th, 2006, 02:48 PM

Man, don't feel too bad.

Ive made a few bad choices in my short life, and my parents refuse to accept that my worse days are behind me.

I am 18 years old, and my parents still tell me what I can do, and where I can go.

Here is a word of advice-dont ever give your parents any reason at all to doubt your intentions, and never lose their trust, its [censored] hard to get it back.